Hello, dear readers. I appreciate you following me on my journey of faith. Before I begin talking about what God has laid on my heart, I want to give you an update about what's been going on with me.
Last Monday, I went back to the OB-GYN to see what the status was on the cyst on my ovary and if I would need surgery. Unfortunately, the cyst had not strunk significantly enough for the doctor to send me on to Nicaragua without laproscopic surgery to drain it. Therefore, I had surgery last Thursday morning. Not only did they drain the cyst on my right ovary, they found and drained a cyst on my left ovary and burned away some endometriosis (which was more than they expected). I have recovered quickly and thank God with very little pain. I am so blessed and thankful to God, the doctors, and my family that I was able to have this done and recover so well! Thank you for those who were praying!
Today, since it is a wet and cold day, I am just taking it easy and resting after having an eventful weekend. I had just got through with reading today's devotion from Jesus Calling when I felt the Holy Spirit speak to me and turn on the TV to the gospel station. I had remembered that I had come across Joyce Meyer's program before on that program, and she is my favorite author and evangelist. I hesistated before turning the TV on, questioning if it was just my ADD trying to distract me from reading the verses from today's devotion, but I felt an urging to quickly turn on the TV. Sure enough, when I flipped to the station, there was Joyce Meyer, and I caught the last 10 minutes of her program. The verse that immediately flashed up in the screen was Luke 10:19 in the Amplified Version: 19 Behold! I have given you authority and power to trample upon serpents and scorpions, and [physical and mental strength and ability] over all the power that the enemy [possesses]; and nothing shall in any way harm you. Joyce went on to talk about how we have a real enemy, Satan also known as the accuser, who will do anything in His power to try to harm us physically or mentally. She reminded her listeners that we have the power to overcome Him whether He is trying to condemn us or make us feel guilty, to use others to judge us, or give what we deserve to those who falsely obtain such things (such as someone else getting a promotion because they played dirty politics).
I find it interesting that God has given me this scripture considering what all He has been teaching me the past month. When I first got back to the United States, I was drawn to Matthew 4:1-11 where Satan tempts Jesus in the desert. This account takes place right after Jesus's baptism and right before Jesus begins His ministry. Jesus is lead into the desert, or wilderness, by the Holy Spirit and fasts for 40 days and 40 nights. Matthew 4:2 says that Jesus was hungry, showing His humaness. Then, the tempter (Satan) comes to tempt Jesus in three different ways.
According to the Life Application Study Bible by Zondervan, each temptation was based on a real human need:
1. Physcial need: hunger. Satan attacks Jesus when He is physically weak by challenging Christ's position as the Son of God, His patience and self control, and His trust in God's provision. Satan was taunting Jesus to prove He was the Son of God by turning stones into bread. If Jesus had given in, it would only prove that He doubted who He really was, that the desires of the flesh dominated His desire to obey God, and that He did not trust that God would provide for Him.
2. Emotional need: security. Satan tests Jesus's faith in God's security and love by taking Him to the top of the temple and telling Him to throw himself down. The deceiver even uses scripture from God's word to falsely provide evidence of what the response will be. I have even read as well (and forgive for not finding the source) that the Jews believed that the Messiah would descend from Heaven into the temple; so Satan might have been testing Christ from what others said He would be. If Jesus had given in, He would be putting Himself at harm, testing God, trying to live up to others' expectations and not God's, and not trusting in God's plan for Him as the Messiah.
3. Psychological need: significance, power, achievement. After failing to get Jesus to demonstrate His "power," Satan boasts of His false power and tempts Jesus by offering the kingdoms of the world to Him. It may be true that Satan had His influence in governing the kingdoms (as we see He used Herod to try to kill Jesus as a baby in Matthew 2). He has used the same scheme of giving "power and wealth" to men since the fall of men in exchange for their worship. If Jesus had given in, it would have proved that He didn't have more power than Satan and He wouldn't have really been the Son of God.
Instead of giving in to Satan's lies, Jesus knew better. He knew who Satan really was, where he came from, what powers he had, and even his certain destiny. Even though Jesus was physically weak and powerless, He used the ultimate weapon to battle Satan: the Word of God. Jesus was sure of who He was as the Son of God, who God was, and what God's promises and commands were. Jesus proved that He had control over His human fleshly desires, that obeying God is more important than doing what one feels and what others' expect, and that He was patient in trusting God's plan to work out.
After reading this passage, I felt that God wanted me to focus on three things: 1) practice the discipline of fasting, 2) learn about our enemy and His plans to kill, steal, and destroy our lives, and 3) meditate on God's promises in His Word in all situations. The first thing I did was look for resources regarding fasting. I had never really fasted before in my life nor have I been in taught in a certain way how to fast. I found a book called Get Healthy through Detox and Fasting written by a Christian Doctor Don Colbert. After reading it and having my mom read it, mom and I started a fasting diet based on the Daniel fast as described by Daniel 1:12. Basically, we have eaten nothing but vegetables, fruit, and gluten free grains such as Ezekial bread, oats, and brown rice. I feel like not only has it taught me to be more self-controlled, but it has made me feel better and healthier. Mom has done well, too, and after a health check in her office, she found out that her blood pressure has significantly gone down and back to normal! We have been on the fast for about 3 weeks and plan to gradually start going off of it before I go back to Nicaragua next week, but I still plan to maintain a healthy diet.
I also found a good book about Spiritual Warefare called Everyone's Guide to Demons & Spiritual Warefare by Ron Phillips, who is a pastor in Chattanooga, TN. Through the process of reading it, I have become more aware that there is a spiritual realm around us. I have learned more about how the cherub Lucipher (which means "bearer of light" or "daystar") was a beautiful, musical, worshipping host assigned to cover the angels and the land of Eden and knew the secrets of creation and life (seek Ezekiel 28:12-17). However, he became prideful and exalted himself over God (Isaiah 14:13-14). Jesus said that he fell "like lightning from heaven" (Luke 10:18) taking with him a third of the angels (Revelations 12:4), which are what we now call demons. Lucipher, who was once covered in arrayment of precious stones, becomes like a diamond buried from the light and his is now called a dragon (derived from the Greek word which means fearful to look upon), the devil (one who hurls through), and Satan (the accuser). Now, his primary objective is "to kill, steal, and destroy" (John 10:10) the children of God. He has an army of demons (demon means torment the mind) to carry out his methods and schemes. Yet, like Luke 10:19 says, those in Christ Jesus are given authority over them, not by our own power, but by the power of the blood of Jesus and the Holy Spirit (Revelation 12:11, Acts 1:8).
I have felt in some ways that my time over the past month here in the US has been a time of testing. I have been tempted to doubt God's provision for me financially and physically through the whole surgery ordeal. I have been fed lies by Satan trying to tell me that I have been a burden on my family, that I have been irresponsible by choosing to go to Nicaragua and leaving a good paying job, that I am weak and will fail. I know this mental attack will continue as I am trying to come off antidepressants that I have been on for the past 10 years, and even now, Satan tries to make me doubt that I can do without them.
However, God has proven to me over and over again that He is faithful. He has shown me that going through this life isn't easy, but I have victory because He has already overcome the world (John 16:33). He has promised to carry on my burdens and fears (Matthew 11:28-29, 1 Peter 5:7). I should not fear because He has given me a Spirit of power, of love, and of self-discipline (2 Timothy 1:7). He has told me not to worry about tomorrow because He has provided and will provide (Matthew 6:33). God loves me and has been so good to me. Satan may try to kill my faith, steal my joy, and destroy me completely, but nothing can separate me from God's love (Romans 8:38-39).
Let us hold tight to these promises, keeping our eyes on Jesus (Hebrews 12:2). Jesus knew exactly who God was and did not doubt His love and plan for Him. We should also be sure to know our loving God and not let the deceiver's lies distort our image of Him. Jesus also knew who He was as the Son of God and did not test God to prove His love. We, too, are called children of God (1 John 3:1) and we must believe that He loves us. He's already proven it on the cross! Finally, Jesus did not give into Satan's temptation and used His authority by the Word of God to drive him away. Let us too resist the devil, and he will flee from us" (James 4:7) because we have been given authority over him.
