Blessings

So this past month has gone by fast and slow at the same time.  However, God has been so good to us and is richly blessing us and teaching us along the way.  Here's a little update about what's been going on....

About this time a month ago, we left for a 15 day visit in Tennessee.  Luis got to experience the cold, and surprisingly, he liked it at times!  We had a great time visiting family and friends; it was such a blessing to spend Thanksgiving with my whole family.  I also had a fabulous baby shower at my home church, First Baptist Clinton, where again we received an abundance of blessings!  I am so thankful and fortunate to have an amazing family and wonderful friends!

Our little "joy and blessing from heaven," Annabelle Zyana, is growing, moving, and developing so fast that I cannot believe it!  Just in two months she will be here!  I thank God that she is being beautifully and perfectly woven together without any major problems.  Unfortunately, I did have to go to the doctor a couple of times while I was at home.  At the second visit, I found out that I have a kidney stone 1 cm long, but I haven't had any major problems with it since the day of that visit and am trusting God that it will all work out.  The best part of going to those visits was that I got some really great ultrasound pictures of Annabelle and was even able to clearly see her face!  She's so precious, and we can't wait to meet her!

 These are my favorite pictures!  The bottom one looks like she's laughing!

It feels like so much has happened since we've been back, and we've only been back two weeks.  I praise God that He is growing and blessing the project in El Paraiso.  Thursday, the sewing class received their pay from the scarves that sold in the US, and Tamara threw them a Christmas party.  They were so excited to get just a part of what they earned from making the scarves, and they loved the little presents that they got!  Please check out all of the pictures and video on Facebook if you haven't yet.

The presents that got from the Christmas party. Faridad is hiding behind hers!

Our youth activities are advancing as well.  Evidently the youth missed us a lot while we were gone, and they were excited when we started back normal activities on Friday.  We still have an average of about 15, but it's a solid group and I can see how God is working in their lives.  So far, we all have given our testimonies (Daniel Price did a great job in giving his last week), and we plan to start hitting specific topics.   Please continue to pray for us and this ministry and that we will be able to minister to them and disciple them in the way that God leads.

Playing a game with the youth= so much joy!

God has been blessing Pastor Juan Pablo and his efforts in leading and ministering with to the adults.  This past Sunday, they had a wonderful worship service (I say they because I was doing children's church), and two women accepted Christ!  Pastor gave an altar call and prayed over different people.  The Spirit was at work so much that people were moved to tears!

The LORD has been so good to us in so many ways, and I take great pleasure in taking just a little part of the work He is doing.  However, He is not just working through us; He is doing a work in us.  I think a lot of people assume that mission work is just all about pouring out and transforming others' lives. But the biggest transformation always happens in the life of the missioner.  God has taught me and transformed me in ways that I never imagined this year.  He has broken bondage that the enemy has had over my life.  He has broken my pride in several areas while making me a stronger and more secure person at the same time.  He has and is teaching us many lessons about daily life and about this world and the spiritual world.

One of the biggest lessons right now is learning that God is the provider and God's plans prevail over our own.  These lessons seem simple and what all Christians should believe.  However, our belief in this only is an idea in our mind until we are really tested to live it out.  A month ago, I wasn't sure how we were going to go on financially here, but as always, God provided what we needed and more.  Sitting here in my house, I can say that everything that I have has come out of the blessing of the Lord.  We don't deserve what we have, and Luis and I even feel guilty seeing how many of the people around us work so hard just to eat a little.  It makes us want to do more to help others, but we can only do what God allows us and enables us to do.  We can plan and work hard in one area, but if it isn't what God has for us, we won't prosper.

I want to give you an example of how our own plans can be thwarted.  I had this past weekend all planned out.  We had plans to buy a car (another huge blessing and provision) on Saturday and drive to Managua today to renew my passport at the embassy.  Turns out that I had trouble getting the money out of my account on Saturday so our plans were completely changed.  We tried to go buy the car in the morning and go straight to my embassy appointment, but when we got to where we were buying the car, the seats and everything inside the car was disarmed for cleaning and we had to wait three hours for it to be ready.  Needless to say, I missed my appointment, but I realized I had left a paper at home that I needed anyways.  These are just the two main examples of how my plans don't work out. And I guess you can say that it was God's will cause that's what happened for one reason or another.

Romans 12:2 says, "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed to the renewing of your mind.  Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is--his good, pleasing and perfect will."  One of the patterns of this world is the mindset that we make our own destiny.  And while it is good to make plans and to work hard for what one has, it doesn't always work out like we plan or we might miss what God's will is for our lives in trying to make our plans work out.

I don't know what His will is exactly for my life.  I do know His overall will is that His children would know Him, obey and glorify Him, and be conformed to the likeness of His Son (Romans 8:29).  However, to know the details of all of coming to all of that, I have to look for His will daily and trust that He plans will prevail no matter what.

Thank you again for reading.  May you be fully and richly blessed in Christ Jesus.

God is faithful and will trample down our enemies!

I can hardly believe that my last post was almost three weeks ago because it feels like it was just last week!  Time has flown by since then; I guess it's because I have been somewhat busier.  However, it's been a blessing to be able to do all that we've been doing and been apart of.

Before I tell you what Luis and I have been focused on, let me give you an update on some of the sick that I had mentioned in my previous blogs:

The woman that had cervical cancer had her hysterectomy Monday, October 28.  Even though she had to wait to have surgery in an uncomfortable hospital bed for a week without hardly eating anything, she came out of the surgery great and was able to go back home two days later.  She is still recovering, although we worry about her doing too much because she does not like staying still and not working.  She told us that when she gets the money and gets a little better, she wants to have a worship service in her house to thank God for getting her through all this!  Even though I wish there was a better way for this to happen, I praise God that He has used all of this to draw her closer to Him and show her His faithfulness!

The young man that has the kidney disease is still fighting.  They have taken him to another clinic in a town called Esteli that's located in the mountains of Nicaragua.  He is receiving dialysis there and is getting better medical attention than when he was in his house.  Please pray for his healing.

The young woman that was pregnant and having severe sickness unfortunately lost her baby about 3 weeks ago.  Due to the extremity of her morning sickness and dehydration, she went into preterm labor at 5 months and the baby girl didn't survive.  I was and am heartbroken cause she is a friend of mine, and she was about as a far along as I was.  She's been really strong through this, even though she's still having physical and emotional pain from all of this.  I hope praying for God to restore her and to reveal Himself in all of this.

Our pastor in El Paraiso, Juan Pablo, had his 2 month baby boy in the hospital for a week with pneumonia.  Thankfully, the baby recovered and is now back at home.  Again, God was faithful and provided Juan Pablo and his family through different brothers and sisters in Christ with what they needed at that time.  People that didn't even know what was going on came to him and gave him money or some other kind of support.  This shows you that God takes care of His servants.

Things in El Paraiso have been going really well.  Last week, Tamara graduated the second sewing class, and we had a party.  They are going to be making stuff to sell (scarves, change purses, tote bags), and I will be bringing a lot with me when I go back to Tennessee on November 20.  Please let me know if you are interested in buying something!

The church in Paraiso is continuing to grow, even if it isn't in abounding numbers.  Yesterday, I had my normal crowd of about 20 kids.  We have about 15 adults that have been regularly attending.   There are a lot of kids and adults that come off and on and some have stopped coming.  I know that the enemy has a stronghold on this community because I have seen it and felt it, but I also know that God has a plan to break that stronghold down.  We just have to persevere and continue to pray and fast.

God has started breaking these strongholds down in our youth.  I mentioned before that we were starting youth activities on Friday afternoons, and so far we've had three successful youth gatherings.  Our first gathering we had 15 youth show up; 20 for the second; and 20 inside and 15 watching outside for the third.  It is such a blessing and an inexpressible joy to see the smiles on their faces and hear their laughter!  They love the games we play; some of the girls that come to our sewing class was playing one of the games on their own after class one day!  Even though they don't know the songs, they try to sing or read along with the words.  I think the testimonies that Luis, Yeral, and Karla have given so far have touched their hearts as well.  I'm giving mine this Friday, and Daniel Price (Tamara's son) will be giving his the next Friday.  Please pray that the words will come out for both of us!

Our crowd of 20 inside and 15 outside on November 8

 

You might ask, "Why is it that so many of the youth stand outside and watch?"  I asked Luis that, too, and he said that it's probably because they know what it means to enter inside a church.  Going inside a church shows that they actually want or are considering something with God.  By standing outside the church, they can still see what's going on and maybe are curious, but they don't want anything with God yet.  However, I still count them, because even though they aren't participating, maybe they will hear something about what is said that will plant a seed.  Maybe one day they'll decide to be brave and step inside even if their friends don't.  Maybe one day they'll meet Jesus, whether it be from the window or in a seat of the church.  Like I said, I know Satan has a stronghold on El Paraiso and especially these youth.  I have felt that before every activity we've had; I can feel that Satan has a grip on some of them and does not want to let them go.  But every time I feel this, I do what only I can do and use the weapon God has given to every follower of Christ: the power of prayer.  And we have to keep praying until every stronghold is demolished and our work is complete.

My hope is that every one of those youth will come to know the Lord, but it is all worth it for even just one.  I know that a few are close to accepting Christ.  I can see it in their faces and their actions.  For example, my dear little friend Glenda Massiel is 15 years old and the community leader's daughter.  She's one of the people that I remember from my first visit in El Paraiso; I still have a picture of her in a VBS activity from July 2009.  Now, she's involved in the sewing class.  She cleans the church more than any other person and always does it with a smile on her face.  She attends church every Sunday, even if no one in her family does.  In devotion times on Tuesdays and Thursdays, she listens attentively.  On Fridays, she's the first one to show up to the youth activities, and even though she's a little shy, she encourages others to participate.  She's always smiling and kind to others; I have never seen her upset.

Reyna, Glenda, and Porfilio

Porfilio, aka Gallo, is often made fun of and abused by other guys in the community,

but Glenda always invites him in and treats him as a friend.

Last week, Luis asked the sewing group who had accepted Christ, and only one other girl, that attends another church, raised her hand.  Afterwards, I approached Glenda and asked her, "Have you not accepted yet?"  She told me "no," but I asked, "But you're close, aren't you?"  She nodded with a smile.  I know that it won't be long, but it's up to her and in God's timing.  Once she does, she's going to be even more of a leader, example, and light to her own community.

I know God's tugging on other hearts like Mario and his 8 other siblings that are almost all youth.  Mario has been coming to church and youth activities and inviting others to come with him.  He always has a smile on his face, too, and always makes sure to thank us after Friday activities.

Mario volunteered to be the "bottle" in the first game we played.

 

So even if it's just for them, it's all worth it. Jesus says after telling the parable of the lost sheep in Luke 15, "I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine persons who do not need to repent." (v.7)  We they do come to Jesus, we will rejoice and have a party with the angels!

 

Please join us in praying and fasting for these youth.  We cannot do any of this with our own power or ideas or words.  Only the Holy Spirit of God can change a person's life and allow us to be His instruments.

 

We plan to have activities this Friday, November 15 and Friday, November 22.  On Wednesday, November 20, Luis and I will be leaving Nicaragua for a couple of weeks to come to some of you in the States!  Yeral, Karla, and Daniel will be in charge of the November 22 event and then we won't have activities till we come back on December 6.  Even though it's just a week, I am hoping the absence of the activity won't do any harm, and we can start back stronger in December.

 

I am excited to being seeing some of you when we come to Tennessee November 20-December 5!  We are looking forward to giving thanks with my family on the 27th and 28th.  Luis is going to his first UT football game on the 23rd; I'm hoping it's not going to be too cold! Annabelle is having her first baby shower on December 1! Other than that we don't have many other plans yet, even though time will fill up.  If you would like to see us, please message or e-mail me.

 

At the end of our church services we recite this verse:

"With God we will gain the victory, and he will trample down our enemies." -Psalms 60:12

 

I declare this for our ministry and may it be for your life as well.  Thank you for reading, for your thoughts, and your prayers.



Facing the Giants

I just got finished watching the movie Facing the Giants for the first time, and if you haven't seen it, I would recommend it.  The message really spoke to me about having faith when things seem impossible.  "For with God, nothing is impossible."  However, this a not a movie review blog, so I want to explain what's going on and why this is so important to me right now.

I've explained in my previous blog that there have been a lot of trials that are testing our faith and the faith of the community, El Paraiso.  The lady that has cervical cancer has been in the hospital since yesterday, awaiting her hysterectomy, but the doctor hasn't even seen her yet.  The earliest she might have the surgery is Friday.  Her kids, which are around 12 and 10 years old, are back home with her husband, but I don't think he really sticks around much.  Her niece is cooking for the kids, and her sisters were in the house just for today.  I stopped by to check on her kids when we were in the community today, and her 12 year old daughter, Daniela, started crying on me.  She feels alone, and she's worried about her mom.  I didn't know what else to do for her except love, assure her that her mom was in good hands, and make sure she was getting fed.

The young man who has kidney failure is still alive and suffering.  According to his cousin, he could hardly breathe on Saturday.  We've asked to go visit him and pray for his family, but his aunt and cousin (whom live in El Paraiso) tell us that it's a half an hour walk from the community in the mud and through a river to get to his house.

Our pastor, Juan Pablo Pineda, showed up ready to go to El Paraiso even though he had spent the whole night vomiting.  He might have a kidney stone but needs an ultrasound to make sure.

Not only are there physical giants, but we are facing some spiritual giants.  The attendance for some of our classes have decreased or the students haven't been able to attend every time, as is required of the class.  We don't understand why they haven't been coming since all of the classes are free and provide training for them to have future jobs.  I have also been discouraged a little in my devotion time with the ladies.  Some days, I can't tell if I am reaching them or not.

Luis, our friends Karla and Yeral, Tamara's boys Daniel, Caleb, and Josh, and I are going out to El Paraiso this Friday to start youth activities.  I can already feel the enemy trying to meddle with us and trying to discourage us from this job.  The youth in El Paraiso are so hard to get to and reach.

Luis and I have felt the spiritual struggle in our own lives.  Without explaining too much of what's personal, we're are being strengthened in our faith.  It's tempting for us at times to just get a normal full time job or try to go back to the US.  It's hard not to worry too much when we have a little girl to be responsible for in just a few months.

However, God has proved and showed us through His Word and different messages and circumstances that nothing is impossible for Him.  We have to stand firm on His promises such as in Joshua 1:5, "I will never leave you or forsake you."  and in Matthew 6:33,"Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." Jesus assures us in Matthew 17:20 that if we "have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."

I wish I could have this faith; I am grasping to obtain it.  I know in my head these things, but sometimes I fight with the doubt in my heart.  I think it's when we face what we call "reason" and concluding with what we see daily.  We see and we know people that die from cancer or kidney diseases, even at early ages.  We see and know personally people that have had many opportunities to give their lives over to Christ and still refuse Him.  We see and know that most of this world lives in poverty and don't have food to feed their children.  It's hard to have faith when you reason with the so called "facts."

However, today I heard a story of a miracle that reminds me once again that even still nothing is possible with God.  Francisco, a man who works with David on the building project in El Paraiso, has a three year old grandson in whom they found a tumor on his eye about a month ago.  The doctors at the children's hospital in Managua determined it to be Retinoblastoma, a rapidly developing cancer that forms in the retina.  They were going to take his eye out completely on Wednesday, but right before the surgery, a doctor that had never seen him before stopped the procedure and wanted to do further testing.  When they went back to do testing today, they could not find any cancer in his eye!  Tamara, her family, and many other people had been praying for God to work a miracle in this little boy's life, and He did!

Nothing is impossible for God.  Facing the Giants might just be a movie, but I am going to believe that God can work miracles in my life and in others lives.  I am going to trust that God is going to change El Paraiso inside out and that out of that community will rise up a generation of faithful followers that will be lights to all of Nicaragua.  I am going to believe that those who are sick will not only receive physical healing but most importantly spiritual healing.  And last of all, I trust in God's provision for my life, my husband's life, and my baby's life.  Will you believe with me?

"Look for the LORD and his strength; seek his face always. Remember the miracles he has done, his miracles, and the judgments he pronounced." Psalm 105:4-5.  Let us remember and trust in His miracles, but let us not forget to seek His face first and not His hand.  When we truly seek God for who He is, we get the greatest blessing of knowing Him.  Then, after that, we can see the blessing of seeing His power work in our lives.

New Beginnings in Paradise

So I am trying really hard to keep up with this blog!  It just so happens that a lot of things have been going on, too, so it makes it easier to come up with things to write.  Also, I think I just need an outlet for some of my thoughts and reflections.

Luis and I are about to embark on a new journey with the ministry in El Paraiso.  Starting this Friday, we are going to be going out every Friday afternoon to lead youth activities!  This is so exciting to me because I have been wanting to do something like this since I first arrived in El Paraiso. Now it seems like the time to begin, and I am so ready to see what God is going to do!

Most of the community is made up of youth (youth here is 15-30).  About half of those youth already have children of their own; most of them have "partners" cause they haven't been legally married yet.  It seems like most of the young men get involved with alcohol, drugs, or some form of gang at a young age mostly because they have nothing else to do.  The most exciting thing that happens in the community is monthly cock fighting events. Most people don't have jobs because there aren't jobs other than working out in the fields for probably about $1-$2 a day.  So I say that some of these youth start going down the wrong path at an early age just to do something.  Hopefully, having a weekly youth activity will help them to focus on something else and lead them to the One who gives an abundant life.

I feel so blessed to be apart of the work God is doing in El Paraiso.  It is a blessing to see the progress that has been made through Tamara's efforts with the sewing class and setting up the beauty class and carpentry class.  It's a blessing to see a group of 20-50 kids every Sunday and tell them a story they have never heard before from the Bible.  It's a blessing to build relationships with the people and to be apart of their lives.

The hardest part about it all is sharing in their struggles, and yet it's a blessing as well.  We have seen a lot of sickness in the community.  Right now, one of our women, who is about 31 years old, is suffering from cervical cancer and is having a hysterectomy this Monday.  She is the provider for her house and works daily making food and selling it, even when she is sick.  A couple of weeks ago, she got robbed of all the money she had, but she bounced back and is still on the go.  Her family hasn't been very supportive of her, and a friend will probably watch her kids while she goes to the hospital by herself on Monday.

Another woman, who is about in her 50's, is the community leader's wife.  Tamara took her for an ultrasound of her thyroid a few weeks ago and found that she has about 5 nodules on her thyroid. She was supposed to go for a biopsy tomorrow, but we are going to have to reschedule.  Her nephew, who is only 31, suffers from chronic kidney disease and was on dialysis at a hospital.  Last week, they sent him home to die, only expecting him to live four days.  Tomorrow is the fourth day.

A young 18 year old girl is about 16 weeks pregnant and has severe morning sickness.  She cannot keep anything down and has had to have several IVs.  Thankfully the baby is okay, but she only weighs about 95 pounds and keeps losing weight.

One of the men that has been attending our church has been suffering from what to me would be a nightmare.  He got bit on the leg by some sort of fly that laid eggs in the wound.  After the eggs hatched, the larvae began to eat away his leg.  He has to forcefully squeeze them out!

These are just a few cases that we know of in the community.  All of these people depend on centralized health care because they cannot afford good, private healthcare for themselves.  Tamara and the ministry has been helping them the best that she can.

The hardest part about living here is always seeing need and never being able to fully meet that need.  You can pay for someone to go to the doctor, but that doesn't mean they'll get better or that you'll be able to pay for surgery or medicine or ensure that they get the best service.  You can get someone food that is hungry, but that food will be used up and they'll be hungry again.  You can give or lend someone money, but sooner or later (and often sooner) they'll come back asking for more.  Physical needs are almost never fully met.

Luke chapter 6:20-22 says, "Blessed are you who are poor, for yours is the kingdom of God.  Blessed are you who hunger now, for you will be satisfied.  Blessed are you who weep now, for you will laugh.  Blessed are you when men hate you, when they exclude you and insult you and reject your name as evil, because of the Son of Man."

No one, especially the poor, really thinks of the poor and hungry as being blessed.  No one equivocates suffering with blessing.  But the reality is that if you never have been poor, never have known hunger, never have known pain and suffering, you never have really learned how to trust in God as if your life depends on it.  When you don't know where the next meal will come from to feed your children, you get down on your hands and knees and beg God to provide.  When you don't have any money or a cure to treat a medical problem, God is your only physician.  Why is this such a blessing?  Luke 6:23 says, "Rejoice in that day and leap for joy, because great is your reward in heaven."  The true reality is that this life is a mist compared to eternity.  The only thing that will count in our lives is how much faith we put in Christ.

It's funny that El Paraiso means "Paradise."  No one would probably think of it that way.  While we hope and the ministry hopes to help improve quality of living in the community, I would like to think that these people are really just heading on the road to the Paradise Jesus describes in Luke 23:43. That one day we would all be people of Paradise, a community in the Kingdom of Heaven.

Please pray and keep praying for El Paraiso, the people mentioned in this blog, and the projects we are doing.  Please pray for Tamara's family, the pastor Juan Pablo and his family, and Luis and I as we minister together.  Pray that we would be able to stand firm and not let Satan get in our way as he often tries to.  Pray for me and Luis as our faith is being tested as well with trusting in God's provision.

Thank you for reading.  I hope you are richly blessed in Christ Jesus.

Let's Catch Up

Wow! I can't believe it's been 5 months since I've written on here! Sorry, faithful readers for not keeping you up to date!  But you may have heard things have changed a lot since I last wrote, and it's been a little crazy!

So the last time I wrote I might have mentioned that I decided to quit my job teaching at the University.  I felt like it was too much for me at the time, and I really felt like it was God telling me to leave.  Well, it just so happened that around that same time is when I got pregnant.  Of course, I didn't plan it. Luis and I wanted to wait till we had been married for three years, not just a month!  However, God had better plans.  About a year ago, I learned that I had cysts on my ovaries and endometriosis, but God has cleaned me of that and put a baby girl in there!  I know that God gave her to me to bring me healing and joy and to bless my life in many ways.

At the end of May and part of June, I had the opportunity to translate for some mission groups that came down.  I was still teaching English twice a week to kids at another ministry, El Ayudante, and going out to El Paraiso three times a week.  Nevertheless, I had to take a break from all of that the end of June when morning sickness hit me hard.  They really shouldn't call it morning sickness; it was more like all day sickness!  And with the heat and different smells here in Nicaragua, it was hard to stay hydrated and keep food down.  Thankfully, I made through it, and it all stopped at the beginning of the fourth month!  But there was a couple of months that I couldn't hardly do anything.

The timing probably couldn't have been better for me to go to the US the end of July and most of August.  Since I couldn't really do much in my condition, it was good to take a break from Nicaragua for a month.  Fortunately, Luis was granted a 10 year tourist visa, and he went with me to the US for the first time!!!  We had a wonderful time in Tennessee, and a day in Miami, visiting my family and friends.  Luis loved Tennessee so much that he didn't want to leave!  He loved the beauty of the mountains and that people didn't throw their trash in the streets like they do here!  We also had an opportunity to share at my home church, FBC Clinton, and my grandfather's church, Middlecreek Baptist, about what God has been doing in El Paraiso,  It was such a blessing to us to share and get the response in prayers and support as we did!

So we came back to Nicaragua end of August, and it has been a whirlwind!  Thankfully, I was able to go back to work teaching at El Ayudante and helping in El Paraiso. Luis started teaching guitar classes to youth at our church on Saturdays, and I decided a few weeks later that I would teach how to read music!  It's been a lot of fun and so rewarding to see the smiles on their faces when they understand and can clap out a rhythm!

Everything keeps growing in El Paraiso.  We are still going out Sundays to do children's church and regular service.  Our little congregation has grown thanks to what God is doing and the efforts of our pastor Juan Pablo Pineda!  On Tuesdays and Thursdays, we still go out to teach sewing classes, but cosmetology and carpentry classes have been added.  After the classes, we have a devotional or the pastor teaches a discipleship class.  It's been really neat to see how God is working and growing!  I am hoping we get more opportunities to reach out to these people and disciple them in the word.

Luis and I have made some changes.  We were fortunate to find another house that is a lot bigger (4 bedrooms and 2 baths!), a lot cooler and quieter, closer to his family and our church, and not too much more than what we were paying!  This past Monday we moved in and have been getting adjusted.  I really like it a lot better than our little house, and I am excited about the opportunities that we will have to minister to others in this house.  We are thinking about having small groups or other Bible studies; I'll keep you posted on what happens!

God has been so good to us, and I am so thankful to Him.  Sometimes, it's hard to not let the voice of the world get in the way that tells me that I'm not doing enough, that we don't have enough, that we need to get normal jobs or move back to the US so we can get by.  But God has been so good to remind me that He is in the one in control, that He is at work and preparing us for something bigger.  He has placed godly people in our lives that keep telling us that God has a big ministry for us and to not get discouraged.  We are learning to trust Him with our every step, which is a hard lesson, but the best one anyone could ever learn.

Luis and I are planning to go back to the United States November 20-December 5.  It will probably be the last time I get to visit until months after the baby comes (she's coming around February 17).  I hope to get to see and visit as many people as I can during this time, and hopefully, there will be baby showers! (Keeping my fingers crossed!)  Contact me if you want to see us!  Until then, I will try to keep this blog up to date! 

"The LORD bless you and keep you; the LORD make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the LORD turn his face toward you and give you peace." - Numbers 6:24-26

A New Season

We've had our first rains this past week, which means "winter" is coming.  The rains were so refreshing and actually made things a little chilly for a while, although it was hot again today.  It's so interesting how seasons work though because I guess I had just gotten used to it being hot, dry, and dusty as if it were like that everyday in Nicaragua year round.  Then, out of the blue, a dark cloud rolls over the city, the thunder rumbles, and crocodile tears of rain fall from the sky.



Las Penitas Beach, Nicaragua

I feel like my life changes along with the seasons at times.  Over the past few years, I have seen my shift from one thing to another like rain coming into a drought.  Sometimes I don't understand why and how these things happen.  I know in part a lot of things were decisions I made, but I honestly believe God lead me to those decisions like switching from one job to another or moving to another country or getting married.  What's even more understandable is to see how I have changed like a deciduous tree through every part of it.  There have been times where I have seen myself mature and blossom, other times where I have seen even a complete change in the way I think or act, and then other times where I have felt like I have lost part of myself only to find out later that God was just pruning me.

I am entering a new season now, like a Nicaraguan winter.  I have had a lot of changes over the past month.  One being about my job situation.  As I may have mentioned before, I am now teaching English two days a week at an organization called El Ayudante that helps underprivileged kids.  It's been a challenge working with kids again, but I have enjoyed it.  Since I am working there, and we have been trying to do more in El Paraiso, I decided to resign from teaching at the University language center, at least for a while.  It was a hard decision, but I felt like the Lord was leading me to make that decision.  Now, I'll be able to focus more of that time on spending the evenings with my husband, his family, my friends, or with the Lord.  Before, we weren't able to go to church as much because I had night classes and church is held here 4 times a week.  Now, Luis and I will be attending his home church at least on Thursday nights in addition to our regular Saturday nights.

I feel like my "extra time" is necessary for the next few weeks to rest and recuperate physically and spiritually before I help translate for about 5 weeks worth of teams.  I have been sick with different infections (kidney, bladder, etc.) on and off the past month and found out last week that I was the way to becoming anemic. Thankfully, I have been able to recover from most of that, and I am taking a special vitamin to give me more energy.  I think the process is just part of becoming Nicaraguan because all these kinds of sicknesses are rampant down here but people just deal with it and move forward.  Like Luis's sister.. she's 19, has a lively 3 year old little girl, works 6 days a week to make ends meet, goes to school all day on her day off, and does it all while suffering from asthma and kidney infections.  That's what I call a strong woman.  Although I wish I could be more like her, I know that I am only limited to what God allows me to do.  I know that I have to somewhat rest if I want to keep going.

I think I need to spiritual rest more than anything.  Over the past two months, I have been dealing with what I could only describe as a spiritual attack over my being and my relationships with those around me.  I won't go into details, but I believe that Satan is not happy with the things that God has been doing in my life and through me and has just been trying to destroy me.  However, I am so thankful that my Savior's grace is sufficient (2 Corinthians 12:9); that when I am weak, He is strong (2 Corinthians 12:10); and that nothing can separate me from His love (Romans 8:38-39).  I am thankful that He has given me a strong, godly husband that speaks truth in my life and fights for me on His knees.  I know God has a ministry for us that is bigger than we can imagine, but now, we are on His training ground.  Gradually, Luis and I together are learning how to be soldiers of Christ (2 Timothy 2:3-6) by training to put on our armor (Ephesians 6:10-18) and taking captive every though to make it obedient to Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5).  We are spending more time in the word, in prayer, and in church to feed and nourish our souls with the truth of God's word and the power of the Holy Spirit.

So that's what's going on with me.  Ministry wise, here is a quick update:
1.  Our church in El Paraiso has grown to about 30 adults and 20 kids more or less! That's a big number for us! 
2.  Tamara and I have started teaching the second sewing group.  The first group still comes and helps the first group, and we have a time in the word together.
3.  Luis and I have adopted an elderly lady that always begs in front of a restaurant on our street.  She looks like she could be in her 70's or 80's, has asthma, can't hardly see, is widowed with no children, and has a sister in a wheelchair at home.  We've been trying to send a meal home with her as much as we can.  She is always so grateful and says, "God is going to bless you for this."  We're trying to figure out how else we should help her.

I could probably share a lot more, but I will save some of it when details develop more.  The bottom line is that God is working here in Nicaragua and in our lives, just like He is working everywhere in the world and in your life as well. 

You know, Luis and I went to the beach Saturday, and we saw a storm that was over the ocean but on the beach where we were.  We were in awe watching the lightning etch-a-sketch beautiful patterns that lit up the sky.  I'm sure someone caught in that storm wouldn't think it was so beautiful.  That's just like our lives.  When we are caught up in the mess of things and problems, it all seems so horrible and frightening.  But from God's perspective, He is taking control of those things and making it into something beautiful so that one day we can look back in awe at the design He has made in our lives.

Summary of Life in the Past Few Months

So, I know it's been a long time since I've written an update, but to say the least, I've been busy lately.  Really, the only reason I'm writing now is because I can't sleep.  I'm hoping that maybe writing some things out will help put my mind to rest. Maybe you can give me some feedback as well.

So since January, we've been going out to El Paraiso almost every Sunday, Tuesday, and Thursday.  We finally have a pastor, Juan Pablo, who has been working with the church, and we are so thankful that God has called him to be part of the team.  Sundays we lead worship.  I do children's church.  Tuesdays and Thursdays, Tamara and I have been teaching some ladies to sew and having Bible study.  The pastor, Luis, and occassionally Tamara's boys play baseball or soccer with some of the young men in the community on Tuesdays and have a small service on Thursdays.  Things have been a little different the past two weeks because Tamara has been in the States, so I have been teaching a few English classes to the ladies in the sewing class and some other youth in the community.

I've also started teaching English two hours a week on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday nights, in addition to the four hours on Saturday, at the University's language center.  I have really enjoyed the evening classes.  In fact, I liked my students so much that I requested to have them again for the next level.  We are about to finish the second round of classes next week.

These past couple of weeks, I started teaching kids English a few hours on Mondays and Wednesdays at another ministry called El Ayudante that works with underpriveleged youth in the area.  I have about 20 something students, and while teaching them English is challenging, I am growing to love them quickly.

On top of everything, Luis and I got married last month!  We had a beautiful wedding and a wonderful time with my family that came down.  We've been enjoying adjusting to our new married life and trying to figure out routines like cooking, cleaning, and grocery shopping.  Luis just got a new job, too, working part time with one of my friends in a ministry, Reposo Divino, that supports pastors and missionaries.

All this to say, things have been a little busy, but I am not complaining.  I am so grateful to have the opportunities that I have to teach and show others Christ.  Even if I don't necessarily present the gospel to my students at the University, a few have shown interest in what I believe and do in El Paraiso that have opened up opportunities for me to share.  I am also very blessed to have two teaching jobs in a country where good jobs are scarce.  What I earn from these jobs, along with some financial support from family and friends, has been supporting us and given me the opportunity to volunteer with the ministry.

I have been worn out lately from all of this, and I wonder if I am doing too much or too much of what I shouldn't be focused on. Sometimes I wonder if I should continue teaching although I do like it, we depend on the income, and I try to be an example to others and follow the example from Nicaraguans that you have to work hard to have what little you've got.   I just wonder if maybe I am supposed to do something else with my time other than teaching like going to church or Bible study in the evenings during those hours or spending time building relationships and discipling.  God reminded me tonight that His disciples were sent out to "teach all nations", making them followers of Christ; I'm not sure if I am doing that the right way or if I should be do something a little different.  However, I know I first need to look to God for strength and direction and then try to organize my time better (like going to sleep at a decent hour); maybe that will help things.

Well, thank you for reading.  I hope to be able to write again soon with an update on everything.  May God bless you and give you peace.

We have been given authority

Hello, dear readers.  I appreciate you following me on my journey of faith.  Before I begin talking about what God has laid on my heart, I want to give you an update about what's been going on with me.

Last Monday, I went back to the OB-GYN to see what the status was on the cyst on my ovary and if I would need surgery.  Unfortunately, the cyst had not strunk significantly enough for the doctor to send me on to Nicaragua without laproscopic surgery to drain it.  Therefore, I had surgery last Thursday morning.  Not only did they drain the cyst on my right ovary, they found and drained a cyst on my left ovary and burned away some endometriosis (which was more than they expected).  I have recovered quickly and thank God with very little pain.  I am so blessed and thankful to God, the doctors, and my family that I was able to have this done and recover so well! Thank you for those who were praying!

Today, since it is a wet and cold day, I am just taking it easy and resting after having an eventful weekend.  I had just got through with reading today's devotion from Jesus Calling when I felt the Holy Spirit speak to me and turn on the TV to the gospel station.  I had remembered that I had come across Joyce Meyer's program before on that program, and she is my favorite author and evangelist. I hesistated before turning the TV on, questioning if it was just my ADD trying to distract me from reading the verses from today's devotion, but I felt an urging to quickly turn on the TV.  Sure enough, when I flipped to the station, there was Joyce Meyer, and I caught the last 10 minutes of her program. The verse that immediately flashed up in the screen was Luke 10:19 in the Amplified Version:  ¹⁹ Behold! I have given you authority and power to trample upon serpents and scorpions, and [physical and mental strength and ability] over all the power that the enemy [possesses]; and nothing shall in any way harm you. Joyce went on to talk about how we have a real enemy, Satan also known as the accuser, who will do anything in His power to try to harm us physically or mentally.  She reminded her listeners that we have the power to overcome Him whether He is trying to condemn us or make us feel guilty, to use others to judge us, or give what we deserve to those who falsely obtain such things (such as someone else getting a promotion because they played dirty politics).

I find it interesting that God has given me this scripture considering what all He has been teaching me the past month.  When I first got back to the United States, I was drawn to Matthew 4:1-11 where Satan tempts Jesus in the desert.  This account takes place right after Jesus's baptism and right before Jesus begins His ministry.  Jesus is lead into the desert, or wilderness, by the Holy Spirit and fasts for 40 days and 40 nights. Matthew 4:2 says that Jesus was hungry, showing His humaness.  Then, the tempter (Satan) comes to tempt Jesus in three different ways. 

According to the Life Application Study Bible by Zondervan, each temptation was based on a real human need:
1.  Physcial need: hunger.  Satan attacks Jesus when He is physically weak by challenging Christ's position as the Son of God, His patience and self control, and His trust in God's provision.  Satan was taunting Jesus to prove He was the Son of God by turning stones into bread.  If Jesus had given in, it would only prove that He doubted who He really was, that the desires of the flesh dominated His desire to obey God, and that He did not trust that God would provide for Him.
2.  Emotional need: security. Satan tests Jesus's faith in God's security and love by taking Him to the top of the temple and telling Him to throw himself down.  The deceiver even uses scripture from God's word to falsely provide evidence of what the response will be. I have even read as well (and forgive for not finding the source) that the Jews believed that the Messiah would descend from Heaven into the temple; so Satan might have been testing Christ from what others said He would be.  If Jesus had given in, He would be putting Himself at harm, testing God, trying to live up to others' expectations and not God's, and not trusting in God's plan for Him as the Messiah.
3.  Psychological need: significance, power, achievement.  After failing to get Jesus to demonstrate His "power," Satan boasts of His false power and tempts Jesus by offering the kingdoms of the world to Him.  It may be true that Satan had His influence in governing the kingdoms (as we see He used Herod to try to kill Jesus as a baby in Matthew 2).  He has used the same scheme of giving "power and wealth" to men since the fall of men in exchange for their worship.  If Jesus had given in, it would have proved that He didn't have more power than Satan and He wouldn't have really been the Son of God.

Instead of giving in to Satan's lies, Jesus knew better.  He knew who Satan really was, where he came from, what powers he had, and even his certain destiny.  Even though Jesus was physically weak and powerless, He used the ultimate weapon to battle Satan: the Word of God.  Jesus was sure of who He was as the Son of God, who God was, and what God's promises and commands were.  Jesus proved that He had control over His human fleshly desires, that obeying God is more important than doing what one feels and what others' expect, and that He was patient in trusting God's plan to work out.

After reading this passage, I felt that God wanted me to focus on three things:  1) practice the discipline of fasting, 2) learn about our enemy and His plans to kill, steal, and destroy our lives, and 3) meditate on God's promises in His Word in all situations.  The first thing I did was look for resources regarding fasting.  I had never really fasted before in my life nor have I been in taught in a certain way how to fast.  I found a book called Get Healthy through Detox and Fasting written by a Christian Doctor Don Colbert.  After reading it and having my mom read it, mom and I started a fasting diet based on the Daniel fast as described by Daniel 1:12. Basically, we have eaten nothing but vegetables, fruit, and gluten free grains such as Ezekial bread, oats, and brown rice.  I feel like not only has it taught me to be more self-controlled, but it has made me feel better and healthier. Mom has done well, too, and after a health check in her office, she found out that her blood pressure has significantly gone down and back to normal! We have been on the fast for about 3 weeks and plan to gradually start going off of it before I go back to Nicaragua next week, but I still plan to maintain a healthy diet.

I also found a good book about Spiritual Warefare called Everyone's Guide to Demons & Spiritual Warefare by Ron Phillips, who is a pastor in Chattanooga, TN.  Through the process of reading it, I have become more aware that there is a spiritual realm around us.  I have learned more about how the cherub Lucipher (which means "bearer of light" or "daystar") was a beautiful, musical, worshipping host assigned to cover the angels and the land of Eden and knew the secrets of creation and life (seek Ezekiel 28:12-17).  However, he became prideful and exalted himself over God (Isaiah 14:13-14). Jesus said that he fell "like lightning from heaven" (Luke 10:18) taking with him a third of the angels (Revelations 12:4), which are what we now call demons.  Lucipher, who was once covered in arrayment of precious stones, becomes like a diamond buried from the light and his is now called a dragon (derived from the Greek word which means fearful to look upon), the devil (one who hurls through), and Satan (the accuser). Now, his primary objective is "to kill, steal, and destroy" (John 10:10) the children of God.  He has an army of demons (demon means torment the mind) to carry out his methods and schemes.  Yet, like Luke 10:19 says, those in Christ Jesus are given authority over them, not by our own power, but by the power of the blood of Jesus and the Holy Spirit (Revelation 12:11, Acts 1:8).

I have felt in some ways that my time over the past month here in the US has been a time of testing.  I have been tempted to doubt God's provision for me financially and physically through the whole surgery ordeal. I have been fed lies by Satan trying to tell me that I have been a burden on my family, that I have been irresponsible by choosing to go to Nicaragua and leaving a good paying job, that I am weak and will fail. I know this mental attack will continue as I am trying to come off antidepressants that I have been on for the past 10 years, and even now, Satan tries to make me doubt that I can do without them. 

 However, God has proven to me over and over again that He is faithful.  He has shown me that going through this life isn't easy, but I have victory because He has already overcome the world (John 16:33).  He has promised to carry on my burdens and fears (Matthew 11:28-29, 1 Peter 5:7). I should not fear because He has given me a Spirit of power, of love, and of self-discipline (2 Timothy 1:7). He has told me not to worry about tomorrow because He has provided and will provide (Matthew 6:33).  God loves me and has been so good to me.  Satan may try to kill my faith, steal my joy, and destroy me completely, but nothing can separate me from God's love (Romans 8:38-39). 

Let us hold tight to these promises, keeping our eyes on Jesus (Hebrews 12:2).  Jesus knew exactly who God was and did not doubt His love and plan for Him.  We should also be sure to know our loving God and not let the deceiver's lies distort our image of Him. Jesus also knew who He was as the Son of God and did not test God to prove His love.  We, too, are called children of God (1 John 3:1) and we must believe that He loves us.  He's already proven it on the cross!  Finally, Jesus did not give into Satan's temptation and used His authority by the Word of God to drive him away.  Let us too resist the devil, and he will flee from us" (James 4:7) because we have been given authority over him.